Clench your buttocks. It's gonna be a bumpy ride!

There are some activities in life that require protective gear. 

 Helmets, padding, shin guards etc.  

As I have been contemplating the events over
the last couple of weeks, I realize

I should have been distributing helmets on a daily basis.

 

I like to look different words up in the dictionary and

this is what I found relating to said protective gear. 

Premenstrual Syndrome: (noun) a varying group of symptoms manifested by some women prior to menstruation that may include emotional instability, irritability, insomnia, fatigue, anxiety, depression, headache, edema, and abdominal pain —called also PMS

Before I get started let me just say, this is NOT a noun!! 

It's clearly a verb.

It isn't a person, place or a thing. 

It's ALL action, baby! 

Okay, back to my topic.

 Protective gear only saves you from bodily harm

 when these symptoms occur. 

So I have compiled a list of things to do to protect yourself

in other ways when dealing with the women in your life.

Every woman experiences these
symptoms on a different level.

(I am one of the lucky ones that has
experienced them on every level.)

When dealing with a woman who has any,
or all of these symptoms,

you can just plan on logic going out the window.

So, Rule # 1:

Do NOT try to reason with her, she is always right.

This really only applies to a man who is dealing
with his significant other.

Her friends can reason with her, but you can not.

Because you are a man, and what do you know?

PMS magnifies EVERYTHING.

The tiniest problem will seem like the world
is coming to an end.

This can cause one of two reactions.

Uncontrollable anger or uncontrollable crying.

(Or both if you are lucky enough to find a woman like me)

So, Rule # 2:

Do NOT try to reason with her, she is always right.

If she is angry, apologize and agree with her quickly.

If she is crying, don't ask her what's wrong.

It's probably your fault.

When you can see her starting to act
a little more kind and gentle,

the PMS is probably reaching it's end.

This is the moment she will look back and realize

she has been a raving lunatic.

This causes her to cry and apologize for her behavior.

At this point you must remember

Rule # 3:

Do NOT try to reason with her, she is always right.

She does not mean to act the way she does.

She actually HATES it when she can't control her emotions.

So, just remember these 3 simple rules and you should

be able to maneuver your way through the jungle.

Otherwise known as the woman's mind.

Oops!  You almost forgot these.

Now, Go get her, Tiger!